One of my favorite topics is the idea of bitachon - trust. I have been listening for years to the shiurim on this topic of my Rosh Yeshiva, R' Yechiel Perr. I recently got a book that he recommended as part of the shiur called "The Six Steps of Bitachon" by R' Chaim Goldberger. This book lays down a framework that can work for anyone. Among the steps is determining that the thing one is asking Hashem for is a 'need.' Then one goes about developing one's trust in Hashem that the need will be filled.
My question is this: Can I only get what I 'need' from Hashem? Can I ask Hashem for something I want?
I would like to believe that Hashem is like a loving parent. As a parent, of course I provide my children with their needs. But I also often provide them with their wants, even if they are not needs. This is part of the way I show love for them.
So can I trust Hashem that He will provide me with my wants?
Part of my personal challenge is that I often am propelled into action by need much more often than by want. "Urgent and Important" is a much greater motivator than "Important but not Urgent."
And I often feel like Hashem is constantly providing me with my needs, but I don't feel as much that He is providing my wants.
But it is often true that my relationship with Hashem is a reflection of my relationship with myself.
So, could it be that I only get what I 'need' from Hashem because I only give motivate myself with 'need?' What if I started doing the things I don't 'need' to do, but rather they are things I 'want' to do - things that are important, but not urgent. Maybe then I would be better able to receive from Hashem the things I 'want,' not just what I 'need.'
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